Tag: domestic violence

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Flashback

HealingHaven

The gunMy catThe gunMy headOver 3 years later The gunMy catThe gunMy head I see my precious boyCuddle him closelyWhile he purrs The gunMy cat You grabbed himAnd put it to his headYou’re sickThat was the end Over 3 years laterThe memories still flood me The gunMy headThe basementThe wallSleeping childrenSilent witnessesScreaming womanLaughing man Aluminum baseball batTapping on my headIn hopes to crush my skullAnd leave me dead The gunMy catThe gunMy brains Could have been all overThat basement floorWhat the fuck exactlyWas that TerrifiedThe most terrifying night of my lifeAs I truly believed that I would die I wonder … Continue reading Flashback

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Check out my Memoir!

HealingHaven

Available on Amazon Kindle! I know you’ll love it! A Lot: A Survival Memoir Through Mental Health, Addiction, and Abuse is a terrifyingly real journey through different variations of hell. From managing mental health issues at an early age, to dealing with addictions, as well as abuse that has occurred surrounding these experiences. A Lot is a personal account of my life experiences which has been mainly tumultuous. I feel like I have experienced some very large and catastrophic events in my life and I wanted to share my story for multiple reasons. I want to educate, I want to … Continue reading Check out my Memoir!

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Like A Warrior

HealingHaven

She waited for changeShe stayedShe thought it would get betterBut she was wrong Through turmoil and painThunder and rainShe cried for daysJust wanting to run away She waited for changeShe stayedShe thought it would get betterBut she was wrong There was love at the beginningOr so she believedBut she was wrongShe was fighting a war she would not winAt least not in the way that she thought She held onShe screamedShe fought for her lifeShe prayedShe beggedHelp She waited for changeShe stayedShe thought it would get betterBut she was wrong FinallyA choice that was made through herBut not by herSomething … Continue reading Like A Warrior

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EBOOK OUT NOW!

HealingHaven

Take a walk through battling my demons with me! This is a poetry Ebook preface to my future book that is in the works. This books aims to touch on the peaks of my pain and healing.**This will be downloaded to your device, you dont need any special app!**This book is available for purchase on my website for $4.99 at danteskyyco.com in the Digital Files page! Direct Link https://app.sellwire.net/p/2oz Trigger Warning: This book contains verbiage regarding suicide, mental health, drug use, trauma, and abuse. Please be mindful while reading this book and remember that help is always available! As always,Thanks … Continue reading EBOOK OUT NOW!

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I need to be here way more often…

HealingHaven

We ended up being able to spend a long weekend in my hometown and it was nice and really so very necessary. But then here we are. Back at this place. This house. The house we may lose before I even get to sell, which would mean we walk with nothing after this total shit show. I am feeling hopeless today. I move forward 2 steps and then get pushed back 10 steps instantly. I am grateful but like, not prepared to live in my car with 2 kids and 3 cats. Obviously I would never let that happen. I … Continue reading I need to be here way more often…

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The end & The beginning.

HealingHaven

  You have been gone a week, well in like 8 hours technically But still. You are gone. Because of me! I finally found the strength that you thought I never had. The strength that you thought you had stolen from me for years. And maybe you did, but guess what, I found it! My babies and I are free. Free.   I lost myself because of you. I lost myself a few times. I did not recognize the girl in the mirror. You scared me. I scared myself. We could not go on like that forever.   I will … Continue reading The end & The beginning.

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in short. don’t give up. you can’t.

HealingHaven

What do you do When you feel like you don’t belong Like a lost dog. And feel so trapped at the same time. Like trying to climb out from a hole that has no bottom, that you can’t seem to get out of. Clawing at the dirt… All while it keeps caving in on you…. Suffocating.   This life is forcing me to use strength That I never knew I had There is no “call home” Whenever things get bad. There is no savior.   Just me.   Fighting this battle. Alone. After what I thought I knew Turned out … Continue reading in short. don’t give up. you can’t.

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Validation

HealingHaven

It is almost Easter. It is almost the 3rd Easter since I saw my family last. It has been 3 years. It feels like it all happened YESTERDAY. According to society, I have committed a taboo, by cutting off the contact with my parents, by cutting off toxic hell.   I woke up this morning feeling some kind of way, because it is almost the 3rd Easter without them. It means nothing, it is just another day, I know this. But my anxiety insists, that I keep in mind, That I am the blackest sheep of all the sheep. This … Continue reading Validation

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Solid Oak Coffee Table

HealingHaven

From now on, I come here to heal. Flashbacks… always… daily….. there is nothing that I can do, except this… I spend a lot of my days helplessly living in the past… triggers are always so simple and unavoidable, there is never any warning. I cant stop thinking about “solid oak coffee table” since last night then to wake and see one posted for sale on a yard sale site thanks facebook. But, specifically, it was the coffee table he made by hand for our living room… side note: crafted in the same place he would cut out a wooden … Continue reading Solid Oak Coffee Table