The Struggle is Real

Why is it so hard to quit something that is so bad for you? I have spent the weekend weening with smoking cigarettes and will officially try to smoke zero cigarettes tomorrow. I don’t understand how something so deadly and so addictive is legal. I have quit so many things; hard drugs, gluten, most meats, but when it comes to cigarettes, I feel so helpless and powerless. Addiction is such a bitch! I know that I am my own worst enemy and need to get out of my own way. I guess I am writing this as a way to … Continue reading The Struggle is Real

Re-post from 02/05/2018

Crazy how things have changed since I posted this. I know in the last 6 months I chose to thoroughly focus on myself and kids. and it worked out better than I ever thought it could.   So my company (Rusnock Naturals) is spreading beyond handcrafted beauty and wellness products and I couldn’t be happier. Together we can learn new and healthier ways of getting through life whether it be meditation, exercise, coloring, self talk, healthier eating, overall healthier head space. I am working so hard at getting my body healthy that I also have been trying to focus on … Continue reading Re-post from 02/05/2018

Therapy.

The struggle To survive Is so real When your mind is working against you daily. And all of the time.   How do you live When you only think about dying?   You simply survive.   Every day of my life The thoughts don’t stop Especially lately   Becoming unstable, then… Choosing my own demise… I was weak. However, I don’t recall being in the drivers seat Of my mind at that point in time…   I don’t need to be under the influence to make bad decisions. My brain does that just fine on its own.   But… “that’s … Continue reading Therapy.